“Eat better. Run more. Squat more. Sleep earlier. Wake up earlier. Make a good breakfast. Drink water. Eat fruits. Read books. Adventure. Talk less. Listen more. Feel deeper. Love better. Open your eyes. Experience life. Be happy.”
"It’s by night that we see our true desires. We reflect on our moments of unhappiness and those yearnings that are momentarily blinded by the sun. It’s when we become poets and philosophers, martyrs and murderers."
middle of the night and everything in my mind surfaces- please indulge yourself in my rant as i attempt to share my thoughts written out here.
I always seem to see myself as “that girl who is frequently misunderstood” and clearly my conclusion to the label i dislike seeing myself as, is an indication that I have difficulty getting my thoughts and words out when the timing is RIGHT. Many good opportunities pass, when I finally think of the right words to say. I do think we all the hardest on ourselves and doing so, it’s creating a domino effect until we find a way to bend and change our minds in leading ourselves down a path to more positive thoughts. Because with more positivty= more self confidence= being happier and truer to ourselves= clearer minds, more room to think :)
Aside from that, I have been struggling lately with a few internal issues of my own. I am still on the search for a new job in my career field, its challenging enough to start a new job in a new city with a new baby. So strategizing everything has been a challenge in the sense of finding the Right daycare in time for new work, debating if working the hours I put in are worth the time and money put into daycare, and lastly separating from this little one is going to be the hardest challenge.
I tend to stress my self out in other areas in my life when one part is not going right (such as being low financially). I must try to keep a positive outlook on other things and know there are farrr greater things in life to be happy about than money could everr buy. But in this day in age, when money is needed for so much, and theres a fast little growing infant in your hands, its hard to not stress. Luckily, I have a very loving & supporting significant other that provides for his family, so I need to focus solely on growing in our relationship, before making money the heart of any issue.
on the other hand, Elijah is 4.5 months old, and every day he makes my heart grow fonder and bursts with joy with all the new little things he’s learning and doing. Hearing mothers previously state that theres ‘no greater love than your offspring…’ I would have agreed and thought nothing more, but until its here, you have NO IDEA.
Ive grown a lot in the past months, but have so much more learning and growing. I want to take on these new experiences with a positive energy and outlook, and scratch the negative thoughts that plague me every once in awhile when I’m feeling down on myself.
until next time… peace out.
- Drink plenty of water.
- Eat breakfast like a champ & dinner very humbly.
- Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
- Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
- Make time for reflection & prayer.
- Play more sudoku.
- Read more books than you did in 2010
- Sleep for 7 hours.
- Take a 10-30 minutes walk—- w/ a smile.
- Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey about.
- Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
-. Don’t over do; keep your limits.
- Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
- Don’t gossip.
- Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
- Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
- Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
-. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
- No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
- Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the process that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
- You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
- Call your family & friends often.
- Forgive everyone for everything.
- Learn from people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
- What other people think of you is none of your business.
- Do the right things.
- Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
- Forgiveness heals everything.
- However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
- No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
- The best is yet to come.
- When you awake alive in the morning, don’t take it for granted – embrace life.
~ Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.
A new chapter has opened, we finally moved to Pittsburgh from good ol’ North Canton, OH. It will be surely missed considering all my family is there and it’s the only state I’ve ever lived. Here, I am excited to explore what this city has to offer and join my partner in raising our little family.
Elijah is going on 7 weeks old (where does the time go?!) I thank God every day for this little guy, more importantly I am so happy to be his mother. He’s so easy going, smiles often, coos like crazy, jerks those arms and legs around trying to figure out whats going on around him, gaining weight like a champ (breastfed only) and his eye contact with people is impeccable. I truly want to soak up every moment with him, considering how time is going to flash before all of our eyes.
My goal is to live happily and healthy here and that starts with eating good & exercising. I’m pretty pumped to get back into working out/ running now that my abdomen is mostly healed from c-section. Looking forward to signing up for some races later this year with my other half.
next up! workouts and meals
Today is the last day, before my scheduled cesarean section tomorrow, of independence. So crazy to think me and my loving partner will not just have to ourselves for the rest of our lives, but a little human to look after. Its a scary yet an exhilarating feeling. We are so anxious and excited to meet our little new bundle of joy tomorrow and pray that he enters this world safe & sound, most importantly, healthy.
It’s a day to relax, get comfortable. I have to remind myself, my life and my independence is not over, but just beginning. I am so excited to start a new life as a mother. I want to give my all to this deserving new life and continue to give my continuous love to my partner, in which we will receive in return.
Pics to come : )
No matter where you go in life, first and foremost, you can never forget where you came from. Something that keeps me unique amongst my peers is being adopted at 3 years old from a small little town called Penza, Russia. My american family flew all the way to Russia in 1992 to adopt a little curly crazy haired child in an orphanage (just 3 years when the Soviet Union ended and open adoption began). Theres been bundles of challenges yet so many enhancing experiences through the years with the new life that God had blessed me with in America. I do wonder at times what my life could have become if I grew out of the orphanage once I was of age, and what kind of life I would have set for myself. Obviously, I would not have it any other way. My family (and when i say family, its the only family i’ve ever known, [my adopted family]) is not perfect to say the least, but the relationships i’ve created and the lessons I’ve learned over the years will last a life time.
The website above was created by my sister, Natalie, whom which was adopted from South Korea in 1983 as a baby. We have 2 other siblings as well.
Adoption is not an everyday topic in which we speak of, its dynamics and the citizens in which were adopted all have a very unique experience of their own. We hope to get more of a community together and share the experiences we’ve had and bring something a little more authentic to the table.
If you are an adoptee yourself or know of anyone being adopted, please introduce this website and lets get a bigger adoption community announced in this year of 2014!
Also, there is a Facebook fan page, please join and share any great valuable information regarding all topics or current media on adoption.
“To my daughter I will say,
‘See your beauty
without a compliment
or a mirror.’”